Don’t blame me, it’s not my fault!
“Don’t blame me” is one of the more common expressions spoken throughout the day. Don’t blame me for the car accident, the lack of organization at the office, my poor grades, not having money to pay rent, not making that free throw, who won the election. This list could go on forever. We are quick to avoid accountability and liability when we blame others and try to shift responsibility. In these cases, blaming often involves a defensive action rather than a harmful intent. Such blames may be almost accidental, casual or reflexive.
Our goal is to crawl out from under the watchful eyes of anyone accusing us. However, we rarely stop there. We don’t simply side-step responsibility and deny involvement with a simple “Don’t blame me.” We solidify our innocence by pointing fingers at someone or something else. To accuse them is to divert eyes more fully away from! Interestingly, the times when we take responsibility and accept blame is when there is no way that we could have influenced the situation. For example, it starts raining during your picnic and I say, “It’s my fault, yesterday I said that it hadn’t rained in days.” As most people will realize, I was not responsible for the rain, so it is easy to take responsibility – no consequences. When there are apparent negative consequences, “Don’t blame me” is quickly blurted out.
However, when you stop saying it is when you start heading on the road to healthy relationships, and controlling your life, and mental, physical and emotional health.
Want to start taking responsibility? Start by eliminating “don’t blame me” from your vocabulary. Read The Blame Game to find out more.
